Some Thoughts

Last night, as Bryce and I were flipping through channels on the tv, we found out that the government had passed the new healthcare bill. Now, I honestly don't know alot about the bill. Bryce informs me of what is going on with government all the time, as he listens to talk radio all day long.

While the democrats are excited because this is "history in the making", its kind of scary for the rest of us. Supposedly, 75% of Americans did not want this bill to pass. Yet, the people that we have voted in to these offices, are not representing the people as they should be. That is their job. Many have gone behind closed doors and made ammendments to these bills, secretly, I might add, like the Gadianton Robbers of old. And it worries me, because it is exactly what Satan wants to see happen to us as a nation, as a free country, as a "God-fearing" people.

In the scriptures, it states over and over again, that as long as "we keep the commandments, we will prosper in the land", but "inasmuch as you don't keep the commandments, you will be cut off from His prescence." Now, if we will study the history of America and the Revolutionary War, we can't deny that our Heavenly Father had a hand in establishing this great country. And it has been a blessed and chosen land since the creation of the world. I have read lots of books on the revolutionary war and I am amazed and touched by the fact that Heavenly Father preserved this nation, and everything fell into place during that war. Even down to the little details, like the weather changing, so we could hide from the enemy or fog clearing up so we could see the enemy coming. The Hand of Providence was watching over our nation, and will continue to watch over us as long as we stay faithful and do those things that our pleasing unto the Lord.

I have been saddened by the fact that we, as a country, voted into office, a president that does not believe in God. Our founding fathers believed and trusted in God. They established and set up our constitution under the direction of God, and now we have a president that does not even believe in a Supreme Being...He believes in himself and wants to have all the power and that is why the government is slowly taking over all that we have. We may not notice it now, but the governments has us in a pot of warm water and they are slowly turning up the heat! We are in trouble as a nation.

Our new president has not been in office for very long, and look at all the changes that have occurred in that short time. We are in more debt as a nation, then we have ever been before. We have a president that is ok with abortions, even when the baby is fully functioning and everything is developed. I think Satan is pretty excited about our new president and alot of the advisors that he has working with him. If you have ever read the book series, "The Great and Terrible", it reminds me of what is happening in our nation right now. There are many evil acts going on behind the scenes...alot of secrets combinations, deceivings, lyings, murderings, and adultery, and the list goes on and on.

Eventually, we are going to have to stand up as citizens of the United States, and decide which side of the fence we want to be on. No sitting on the fence anymore. If it produces good, it comes from God. If it is not good, it comes from the devil. There is no in between.

Heavenly Father will not continue to bless and protect this nation, if we turn our backs on Him. But, that is exactly what our country is doing...taking his name out of the pledge of allegience, not allowing prayers in schools, and all sorts of other crap that the government is doing. I feel like we are in trouble and I know things will just get worse and worse, until our real president, our real leader, our real Master, our only Saviour, even Jesus Christ, will come back to this Earth to save His people, those that still believe in Him and have trusted in Him.

Off To Guatemala

My little brother Tyler went into the missionary training center today in Provo Utah. Tyler will be there for 8 weeks learning Spanish and the gospel of Jesus Christ. He will learn how to teach others the gospel and most importantly to serve others.

We are so happy for this decision that Tyler has made to go and serve the Lord for two years. He will make a wonderful missionary and the people of Guatemala will love him. Its been hard to say good bye to him for all of us, but we will blessed by his service.
My parents are so proud of him, but this has probably been one of the most bitter-sweet moments of their lives. My mom has had children in her home for 41 years and Tyler was the baby. Mom and Dad are Tyler's best friends and they have such a close relationship. This has been hard for them to watch Tyler say his goodbyes as many, many tears have been shed. It will be a big adjustment for them over the next couple of months. They are wonderful parents and maybe this will give them the opportunity to travel more to see me!!!!

Its The Small Things In Life...

Last night, Clayton was in one of those moods where he just wanted his mom to hold him. I wrapped him up in his blanket, put a binki in his mouth and just cuddled him close to me. He was wide awake and he just layed there and looked at my face and into my eyes. I sat there and wondered what he was thinking as his eyes searched over my face over and over again. He was so content and peaceful as he sat in my arms. It was just one of those moments you never want to forget. Later that night, Bryce said, "I know exactly what he was thinking." "Man, I love my mom!" And that made my day!



Also, last night, Cooper came into our room around 11:15. He was having a hard time sleeping, so I went in and layed with him while he proceeded to snuggle with me, climb on me, and tell me about all of his classmates at school. It was just a nice moment to be able to just sit and visit with him.

The New Year

As the first couple of weeks of 2010 have come and gone away, I have realized that already the new year has brought me some new things in my life:

1. A Flabby Stomach- now I can thank my beautiful son, Clayton, for my stomach (and maybe my parents for giving me the "short" gene, which caused my belly to grow straight out since there was so place else for it to go). I have come to understand that it will never go away because there is so much skin....oh, well...what can you do...and it was worth it....definately worth it!

2. This year I have had a better appreciation for the fact that Cooper was a really good baby and that we were probably spoiled with him. He ate when he was supposed to eat. He slept when he was supposed to sleep. He never spit up. Now, Clayton, on the other hand, has no set schedule and he is alot different than Cooper was as a baby. Bryce and I say there is no ryhme or reason with Clayton. I still think he is a good baby compared to some and I wouldn't have him any different. We are so blessed to have these two miracles in our life. 3. The New year has brought me some gray hair....10 to be exact that myself, Bryce and Jocelynn have pulled from my head. I feel like I am a little too young for gray hair, so I am going to continue to believe that the gray is from all the drugs I had to take last year!
4. A desire to set some personal goals...like working out 3 times a week (which I have been doing), eating healthier (also doing good so far), reading the scriptures and ensign articles, helping Cooper with his speech and letters, and being better about remembering birthdays.

5. Loss of Hair...and I mean alot of hair. It is falling out like crazy. I find mounds of it in my brush, pull out tons of it when I shower, and poor Clayton has it grasped between his fingers all the time. I have been given two theories as to why this is happening: a) Jocelynn says it is because I got an epidural b) my friend says it because I have stopped taking prenatals (which I have starting taking again this past week). I don't know, but is drives me nuts when I feel it on my arms or down between my boobs. Did I just say that? You know you women have all had that happen a time or two!

6. A love for P90X..I just started it last week and I really like it. Some of the workouts are extremely hard and I have been so sore I could hardly walk or sit, but hopefully they will be worth it. I even talked Bryce and Tyler into doing it one night!

7. A loss of time...I am not talking about my actual time because I actually have more of it since I got layed off my job and released from my young womens calling in our church. What I am talking about is the fact that I have been confused the last few weeks as to what the real time is. My watches, cell phone, clocks, etc are all off one another. For those of you who don't know this about me, I am very anal about the time being correct and exact and all my watches and clocks need to match. So, if anyone has a good idea on where to find the exact time, please let me know. This is the first time this has ever happened and it really bothers me. I like to be "on time" to events, but I can't if my clocks are wrong!
8. Blurp. I finally learned how to use blurp two nights ago. Blurp is a program used to make photo books from your blog. I stayed up entirely too late the other night and finished my 2008 book and now I am almost finished with my 2009 book. It's easy and its fun and I can't wait to see the end result when the book actually gets here. It gives me incentive to blog more and do better thought provoking posts so that I will have a record. This is just like a journal, except its better because it has pictures. Scrapbooking on the other hand is nice, but is mostly pictures with not alot of writing.

I am thankful for this New Year and I hope and pray that everyone will have a blessed year and be healthy and strong. I am thankful for the cute family that I have to enjoy every day and I hope to take advantage of the time I have with them each and every day. May God bless us all and watch over us this 2010!

Happy Anniversary

Bryce and I celebrated our ninth year of marriage on December 27. Thanks goes out to Jacqui for watching Cooper and Clayton, so we could enjoy our anniversary alone. Also, his boss, Chris, was nice enough to let us go and stay in his cabin over in Bear Lake. It took us a while to find the key to the cabin because it was hidden in the snow, but other than that, we had a great time. Bryce cooked me shrimp scampii, which was wonderful and we snacked on all sorts of junk food that night. The next day, we went back to Logan and went to the movie Invictus.

Bryce, thanks for the last 9 years. We have had our up and downs, just like any couple, but it has been a great journey so far....and I look forward to many more! We have grown so close over the years and I am so blessed to have you in my life. You are a wonderful husband and dad. Thanks for your love and support.

My Birthday

On Friday night, Bekka and Jacqui took me out to a movie. We had a great time. The movie wasn't that great but I had a good time hanging out with them! Thanks for taking me out.
On Saturday night, Bryce took me to my favorite Mexican restaurant (in Utah). (And, no, there was no cinammon in the chicken burritos Sherrie and Shayne) The food was great and some of my friends showed up which made it even greater.After dinner, we came home to a decorated house with the sign: "aging to perfection". Some more friends came over and we celebrated with cake and ice cream and presents. It was alot of fun and nice to have everyone over.

On my actual birthday, Clayton decided to wish me an early happy birthday, so he woke up at 4 to eat. He went back to sleep around 5 and decided it was time to get up at 7:45. He just wanted to make sure I didn't miss out on my birthday since it is the shortest day of the year! Bryce got me a pink Ipod Nano for my birthday. Hopefully, I can learn how to use it. It looks really nice and it also takes videos so that with be useful. Thanks Bryce for making my birthday special.

Jocie, Tawni, and Steph drove down from Logan to eat lunch with me, Bekka, and Jacqui at Red Robin, my favorite Burger joint. Thanks for celebrating my birthday with me.

Time Out for Women

Last month , I went to Time Out for Women with Steph, Jocie, Jacqui, and Kamie. It is kind of like a conference where there are uplifting and inspirational talks. It was amazing and I had such a great time. We got to meet one of my most favorite people, Sherry Dew.

Uncle Lynn

On Sunday, July 19, my uncle Lynn, passed away in his home surrounded by his wife, children, and other family members. Lynn courageously battled colon cancer for the past two years of his life. I got to know my uncle better in the last year of his life then all the years before.

I also learned alot about him at his funeral. He was a great man who gave years of service to the community. He was in the National Guard, he was a member of the Beaver Ski Patrol for forty years, he worked on city council in Wellsville for over 20 years and he loved to spend time with his family.

My aunt April and Lynn were perfect for each other and April helped him really come out of his shell. It was so neat to see the love that they had for each other. I want to thank April for being so wonderful. She is such a great part of our family and we would not be the same without her. She is one of my most favorite people ever. I love you April.

Lynn will be missed by us all but hopefully, our memories of him will live on. I know that he is happy now and finally at peace. I know he is surrounded by love ones, including my son, Clayton. I know that he is learning and growing and waiting till he will be reunited with his parents, wife, and children once again. We love you and miss you Lynn.

Sisters Day Out!

When Sherrie was up visiting a few weeks ago, we went out for a few hours with just the sisters. Thanks to Steph (she arranged babysitters) we were able to enjoy our day without the kids. First, we went to Great Harvest for lunch. They have the best "pesto turkey sandwiches" and pumpkin chocolate chip bread. We were not in any hurry so we just spent time talking and eating great food.

After lunch, we went to the local beauty college and got pedicures. The girls doing our feet did not know we were sisters at first and then when they found out, they were surprised. The pedicures felt great and it was fun to just spend some time together with all four sisters. We don't get the chance very often! I hope my sisters know how much I love them and they mean the world to me. I am so thankful for each one!

Happy Father's Day

On Saturday night, we went to dinner at Coppermill with Jocelynn, Kyle, Sherrie, and Brian. It is one of our most favorite restaurants. We had a good time visiting with each other.

On Sunday, we celebrated Father's Day by going to church with Bryce's parents and then we went out to Grandma and Grandpa Coopers for lunch. We were able to take some "sister' pictures while we were there. It's not often that we are all together, so we took advantage of it by gettting some picts.

I hope that Bryce had a good Fathers Day! He is a very good daddy to Cooper. Cooper loves to spend time with Bryce and I enjoy watching them play together. It is fun to see how excited Cooper gets when Bryce gets home from work every night. I am blessed to have Bryce as the Father of my kids and as my husband and friend. He is a good man and he takes good care of us!We love you Bryce!

Targeted Ultrasound

Bryce and I were able to go to my targeted ultrasound today. This is an ultrasound where they check the brain, heart, and basically all of the organs to make sure every thing is doing ok. They do alot of measurements as well.
When she first started the ultrasound, Clayton was sucking on his thumb. His head is at the bottom of my belly and his feet are up by my ribs. She measured his head, abdomen wall, and thigh bone, as well as other things. I am almost 25 weeks along, but Clayton is measuring 26 1/2 weeks, so hopefully, my doctor will change the due date. She said the due date should be Sept. 19th.
As she continued through the ultrasound, my eyes starting getting fuzzy and I was getting very uncomfortable. She had me turnover on my left side so I did not pass out. I guess I had been laying on my back for too long and it was making me sick. I missed half the ultrasound but Bryce got to see it all. When I turned over, Clayton started moving like crazy and the doctor was having a hard time getting pictures and measuring things because he was so active.

We were able to see a side profile of him, and as far as I could tell, he was a cute baby! But, the best news is that he looked healthy and strong and the doctor said everything looked good. So, once again, our prayers are being answered!

A Fun Day With Cooper

I have realized that it is so easy to get wrapped up in doing things around the house or in the yard, instead of spending time with our kids. Especially, when we have children that can entertain themselves. I find myself at the end of the day wondering where all my time went and why I didn't spend much quality time with Cooper...and then I start feeling really bad and guilty and I always promise myself that I will do better the next day. And I am sure it will just get harder with the more children that we have. Anyway, Cooper and I have had a fun time together this week, but on Friday we had really a good time. After I finished work, Cooper helped me pick strawberries off our vines in the backyard. As Cooper put it, "they were excellente!"
Next, we went to eat lunch at our weekly chinese restaurant with Bryce and my friend, Bekka. Cooper loves Chinese food and he made sure that he was sitting next to me. We shared our rice, noodles, and chicken with each other. After lunch, we went over to the park in Kaysville and went for a walk around the softball fields. Cooper played on the playground for a little while and then we went to Bryce's shop. Bekka shared a yummy cinammon roll with us from Great Harvest and then we played "hide-n-go-seek".

When we got home, we played with Play-dough and then Cooper came out in the back yard and I was able to swing him for a little while. We ended our fun day by going on a walk while he rode his bike. The weather has been so nice (meaning cool, but rainy). We have spent lots of time outside the last few weeks. Anyway, it was just nice to focus all my time on him and we had a great time! I love you Cooper and I hope you will always know how much you are loved by your mom and dad!

Maternity Massage

On Thursday, I got a babysitter for Cooper and decided to go use my massage gift certificate. My friend bought me a massage for my birthday and then we found out 3 weeks later that I was pregnant. Anyway, so I decided I better use it before I got any bigger and before it expired. I called to schedule my appt and they told me that they do maternity massages. I was so excited because I love massages!

I got into my room and the lady told me that there was a hole in the bed where I was supposed to put my stomach. It was a padded hole that they try to adjust to fit different sized bellies. So, I got undressed for my massage, climbed on to the bed and attempted to place my belly in this hole. I kept readjusted many times, as I was very skeptical about this hole in the bed. The lady came in the room and started the massage. I dont know if I mentally made my self freak out or I there really was pressure on my stomach, but I all of a sudden felt like I was going to pass out. I sat up and asked the lady if I could have a drink of water. When she got back to the room, my forehead was completely wet with sweat. Needless to say, I ended up doing my massage while laying on my side. It was a nice, relaxing massage and the lady was very kind and understanding of my stupidity. I don't know if I will ever try a maternity massage again!

Things I Miss....

Well, I am almost 22 weeks along and doing pretty well. I have noticed my stomach starting to get alot bigger the last couple of weeks. I have also had many people tell me that I am carrying the baby really high. I am finally starting to feel him move a little, which is kind of neat. I have also noticed that my legs get tired if I stand alot. While mom was here, I realized that my feet were totally swollen one night and to be honest, I freaked out a little bit. But, I have been blessed with a good pregnancy thus far and I hope and pray that Clayton is continuing to grow and develop like he should.

-Bending down (with ease) to pick something up. Bryce will hear me grunt every now and then and always ask me if I am ok....I just reply, "I am just picking something up off the ground."

-Being able to put my socks on...I even have problems buckleing some of my shoes.

-My clothes...i knew I would not be fitting into my clothes, but I was a little bothered one Sunday when I went to put on not one, but four of my outfits, and none of them fit...not a big deal, just had to go buy some new Sunday clothes.

-Taking "HOT" Baths...i love baths, especially during the winter. It's what helps me stay warm, but I have not taken one bath yet, bc I don't want to harm Clayton...it's not too bad now that summer is here, but it took some getting used to.

-riding around on this little red scooter. I used to draw a race track with side walk chalk and then chase him around pretending to be a police officer. He asked me to play with him a few days ago, and I sadly told him I could no longer play that game....i would have to chase him by foot now!

-being able to pull weeds or plant my garden without my back killing me the rest of the day...It's that time of year again to get out and pull weeds, (which I enjoy) but I have a hard time doing it now. I never thought the day would come that I would move a stool around from weed patch to weed patch so I could sit down to pull the weeds.

-my "D" size bras...i have already had to upgrade once...i think I am in trouble!

Mother's Day

This year, I had a wonderful Mothers Day! I woke up and Cooper made a card for me and gave me the Lady Antebellum CD. Then Bryce gave me a card, along with a Zac Brown CD and a beautiful picture of Joseph Smith kneeling in the sacred grove. Bryce also made me "german pancakes" for breakfast. YUM!

We also had a great sacrament program at church. Some of our young women sang the most beautiful song about mothers. It had me in tears. It also made me think about the miracle of life. I am amazed at the way a baby is conceived, as well as the way a baby grows and develops. It is such a miracle and it just goes to prove that Heavenly Fathers hand has created everything. What a joy it is to be a mother!
We got to Young Womens class and we had a lesson on journaling. There were two things that I came away with that day from the lesson. First, I need to get a history of my grandparents and my parents. What an invaluable thing to have! We also received a peice of paper that challenged us to keep a journal and to make an entry into it everyday that answers this question:

Thinking back on your day, what things happened because of the Hand of Heavenly Father?

I am really going to try and do this because it will help me realize and be more grateful for all of my blessings.

After church, we went up to Smithfield to have a Mother's Day party at Steph and Paul's. We had Cafe Rio salads and burritos. It was a "Cooper" party and we had a great time eating dinner, visiting, playing volleyball, and taking cute picts of the kids. But, my favorite part was the fact that mom was in town and I got to spend the day with her and grandma. It's been years since I have actually seen mom on Mothers Day, so that was special.

I am so thankful for my mom. She is an amazing lady and a great example to those around her. She has such a caring heart and she goes above and beyond in everything she does. She is a great leader, friend, and mother. We are so blessed to have her for our mother. Mom, thanks for being the best. I love you!

The Moment of Truth

On January 25, Bryce, Cooper and I went down to the clinic at 8:30 am to have my blood drawn. This was our pregnancy test. I was so sick (nerves) on the way home. I didn’t say a word almost the whole time. At 12:30 that day, the nurse called and told us that we were pregnant. We were so excited, emotional, and thankful for this blessing and miracle that has happened.

Our due date is October 2. They said that my numbers were really high on my blood work. Anything over a 100 is pregnant and I was at a 400.

We are very excited, yet it still doesn't feel like I am really pregnant. Bryce and I feel very humble. This is a blessing that has taken 7 years to happen, and as you know, it hasn't been easy for us. While I am happy to be pregnant, I have also been on the other side of the spectrum and I know how if feels to have infertility and all that goes along with that trial. It is a difficult thing to go through and I want to make sure that I am sensitive and thoughtful about those who are struggling with infertility. Bryce and I know that for some reason, we are being blessed with this opportunity right now and we are so thankful to our Heavenly Father. We are so grateful for the things that we have learned along the way, and we know that we have much more to learn.

The Big Week For Us!!

Our family and friends had a huge fast on Sunday, January 4th for us. I know that there have been thousands of prayers offered on our behalf and we have been blessed by everyone’s faithfulness and support.

January 8, (Egg Retrieval) we got to the clinic at 7 am. They brought me back, put a gown on me, and started an I.V. They gave me medicine that made me forget what happened. I do remember, however, the doctor putting a huge sponge up inside me three times to clean me. This hurt but that is all that I remember. Bryce got to watch the entire procedure. He said that they would go up with a very long needle. They would stick it into each follicle and pull out the egg and liquid. He said that I would wince every now and then and that I kept trying to close my legs. They had Bryce give them a sample and then they looked through his sperm, picked the best ones, and injected them into the mature eggs. It took me a while to wake up from the drugs and I threw up as soon as we started driving. But, I slept for the rest of the day.

We later found out that they retrieved 21 eggs, 16 were mature, and they were able to fertilize 15 of them.

I also started the “dreaded” progesterone shots this night. These shots have long, thick needles and the progesterone is thick. These have to be given in the muscle, which is in the hip. This helps the lining of the uterus stay thick, so that the baby stays attached.

January 10-the embryologist calls and tells us that all 15 of the embryos are dividing and doing well, so we would be coming in on Tuesday for the Embryo Transfer.

January 13- we go to the hospital for the Transfer. They said our embryos were “poster child embryos.” Again, I am placed in a gown and then they gave me some Valium to help me relax for the rest of the day. They showed us the little embryos up on the screen before they put them in my uterus. They implanted two. You cannot see embryos with the naked eye. The transfer went smoothly and I didn’t feel a thing. I went home and slept the rest of the day. I was on bed rest for three days, so that the embryos would stay attached.

The Process

Many of you know that Bryce and I have been married for over eight years and trying to get pregnant for seven of those years. We tried many infertility treatments, such as chlomid and artificial insemenation four times. We did all the testing and blood work and everything seemed normal. Well, we decided to quit all that stuff in Summer of 2004. We turned in our adoption papers in November and our family was blessed with Cooper in April. Cooper has been the greatest thing that has ever happened to us. Looking back, we would go through all that again to get our special little boy to our family. It's funny how Heavenly Father's plan is different for each of us. But His plan is perfect and we just have to have faith in Him.

Last July, Bryce and I decided that we would go down the infertility specialist at the University of Utah and start the whole "process"again.

In July, I set up our first appointment with Dr. Hatasaka, whom we had heard many great things about.

On September 10, we had our first appointment. We sat down with the doctor and went over all of our medical history. He looked through our charts from Dr. Fowers and asked us lots of questions. This took a little over an hour. He decided that since it had been 4 years since we had done any testing, that we should do it over again. So, for the next five weeks, we did the following tests:

Blood work (jenn) ; they tested my hormones for FSH and also to make sure I wasn’t a carrier of cystic fibrosis; they popped my blood vessel and my entire elbow and half my arm was black and blue for weeks
HSG Exam- (jenn); this takes place at the hospital; they basically are putting dye into my fallopian tubes to make sure there is no blockage; they do this while I am laying under an x-ray machine; very painful procedure
Semen Analysis (bryce); everything came back normal;
Hamster Egg Test (bryce) this test consists of having 10 hamster eggs flown from Chicago to Salt Lake; Bryce’s semen is placed on them to see if they can penetrate the eggs (hamster eggs are the closest eggs to human eggs) ; on average, 2 sperm with penetrate each egg; Bryce had 8 sperm that penetrated each egg

Again, everything came back normal, as we expected. So, it was back to the drawing table for us and the doctor. I will be posting the next 3 days!

My Birthday

Unfortunately, I turned 30 this year but Bryce made it a special day for me. I have been really bothered this past year, knowing that I was turning 30 years old. It's just weird to think that I am not in my 20's anymore. Anyway, Bryce got me a beautiful picture of a mother holding a little baby. It's called "A Mother's Love". He also got me a pretty bracelet and a cute pair of shoes.Bryce had a little surprise party for me at "Juniper Take-out". It was funny because when we showed up, no one was there to surprise me....they were all late! It was still fun to see everyone and to enjoy a great lunch with my family.
We also played in the snow with Cooper that day. We had a "Cooper Family" Christmas Party on my birthday as well, so it was good to be able to see all of my grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles and family. The only thing that was missing was all my family in Texas.

Carrie Underwood

On Wednesday night, we went to a Carrie Underwood Concert with Brad and Carrie. It was so much fun and she is such a great singer. I really liked how she involved the audience and I have never heard someone belt it out like she can....it is amazing to listen to her. She pulled a 14 year old out of the audience and let her help sing "American Girl". She also said that one of the things that she loves the most about her job, is the songs that she gets to sing. I really like Carrie because she seems so down to earth.
This was the second time that we were able to see her in concert with Carrie and Brad and we had a great time with ya'll. Thanks for hanging out with us that night. It's always a fun time with ya'll.